Wednesday, March 25, 2015

An appointment

As you know, I’ve been trying to get in to see a new neurologist. Thank you again to everyone that recommended someone. I researched the names given to me and decided on one and then began the process of becoming a patient.

On a side note - I’m convinced that we’re called “patients” because we have to have patience in getting a doctor, getting a diagnosis, getting better. It’s an art, not a science, right?! ;)

But I did my part - getting a referral and getting my records sent and then I waited.

Last night, I prayed specifically that either the neurologist’s office or my internist’s office (the one who gave the referral) would call me today to let me know if I was accepted as a patient and could get an appointment. I know, it may seem frivolous to some to pray specifically about that, but I didn’t know what I was supposed to do next. Was I supposed to call them back and get an appointment or were they going to call me? Did they have everything they needed? Did this neurologist even want to take me on as a patient? I tend to worry about frivolous stuff like this, so last night I just took it God and decided He could worry about it for me.

This morning I was at work when my desk phone rang. It was my internist’s office calling to say that I have an appointment scheduled for May 11 with the new neurologist. You can’t tell me that God doesn’t answer prayers, no matter how frivolous they may seem to outsiders! What’s important to us, is important to God.

So now I wait until May 11. Until then, I'll be praying that this new neurologist will be the right fit and that everything will go well.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015


Ten years ago today I was blessed to have been able to buy a house. I was 24 and had just finished paying off $20,000 worth of student loans in December 2004. Mom and Dad had graciously said that I could live with them as long as I was paying off the loans. But when the loans were paid off, I knew the next step was to move out! The house that I am now celebrating 10 years in has been a blessing in disguise. I have a ranch house, meaning no stairs. Who would have thought that would have come in to such big play just a few months later when I started having major walking issues?! God knew! Also, when I bought the house and had a house warming party for it someone mentioned that the halls in the house seemed extra wide, like they were handicap accessible. Again, who knew that this would come into such huge play, when now 10 years later I use a walker to get around?! God knew!

Ten years later and I cannot believe that I have owned my own home for that long. When I “planned” my life (what’s that famous Woody Allen quote? “If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans”.), I never thought owning a home would be such a big deal. My plans were to get married right out of college and have 5 kids before I turned 30 and to be a stay-at-home mom. What I didn’t plan was to be single, pay off my student loans in two years, start having major walking issues, spend my 20’s going to doctors trying to figure out the walking issues, paying off my first car in a year, landing my dream job or buying a home. But now it is 10 years later and my initial plans have been completely, utterly turned on their head. I did not get married right out of's 13 years later and I'm still not married. I didn't have 5 kids before I turned 30 - I don't even have one. And because I don't have kids, I’m not a stay-at-home mom. What I do have ten years later is a house I now call home, which I’ve managed to keep from crumbling to the ground, I had a 9 year period where I didn't have to make a car payment and now I have a “new” car (bought in 2011) that I’m paying off which is perfect for hauling my walker around in, a diagnosis of dystonia so I’m no longer going from doctor to doctor trying to figure out a mystery illness, and my dream job of working in the media (and actually working in the field I went to college for!) I say all-in-all I’m pretty darn pleased with how the Lord took everything I once thought I wanted and needed and completely turned it on its face! In my wildest dreams, I never would have thought my life would be like it is now. I’m thankful and blessed with all I have.

On the dystonia front – again, I must emphasize how blessed I am. I’ve been worrying about medication. I was completely out of refills when I got the letter from my neurologist saying that he was moving out of state. I called him and left a message with his nurse and did get a refill. However, when I went to pick it up, I noticed that it was only for a week’s worth of medicine. That’s when I started to panic. I’m in the process of getting a new neurologist, but even if I got one today, I probably wouldn’t get in to see him/her until months from now. So, I called my family doctor, explained my situation to the lady who answered the phone and my family doctor prescribed the medication I needed. Thank you, Lord that I have enough medication to get me through until I (hopefully!) get in to see a new neurologist. It’s one less thing I have to worry about (and worry really does affect the way I walk, interestingly enough!) Again – I am blessed to have an Internist who knows me and knows that I need the medication and is not afraid to step in and prescribe while I’m transitioning doctors.

I’ll end this post by saying, thank you. Thank you so much for reading. I am SO encouraged by all of the comments you leave. I’m always scared no one’s going to read these blog posts and then am humbled when you do. So, thank you, thank you for reading. Once again, I am blessed, blessed, blessed!

Monday, March 9, 2015

A little update

There’s not a lot new to report, I just wanted to give a little update. I’m getting all my medical records sent to a new neurologist. I hope he’s the right one for me. :) He came highly recommended and when I asked my friend Cheryl (the one who referred me to Dr. M.) if she knew him she said that he was a great choice. Hopefully (fingers crossed, prayers going up), everything will fall into place. However, I know that if he’s not the right one that the Lord will lead me to the one I need to see. I’m trying not to worry about it.

My walking has been the same – not the best, but definitely not the worst. I almost fell backwards yesterday as I lost my balance (while vacuuming), but thankfully, I was able to catch myself. If I had fallen, at least it would have been on carpet! I’ve lost my balance several times over the past week, but thankfully have always been able to catch myself. This used to not be the case. I used to fall every single time I lost my balance. So I guess that means the exercise I do and the medication I take is working!!! My dad caught me once too as he was holding on to me as we walked into the movie theater and I tripped. While taking showers this week, I’m back to holding onto the walls, as closing my eyes makes me lose my balance. I found myself this morning wistfully looking at some women who were crossing the street holding umbrellas. I don’t use umbrellas anymore because I can’t hold them and onto the walker at the same time. I miss holding an umbrella – how silly is that?! Rain coats are nice, but umbrellas – well, you just don’t know what you’ll miss until you don’t have it/can’t use it anymore! But enough of my complaining (because, after all, it does no good in the first place, except to get me in a bad mood.).
I’ll end on this: I had an excellent weekend.
I saw a movie with my parents on Friday night.
On Saturday I got my hair chopped off by a great friend, who did a fabulous job. This picture doesn't do it justice!)

Also on Saturday, I got to have fun (and get paid at the same time) by doing more patient acting at UT hospital. This time I was supposed to be a 19 year old unrestrained male driver who hit a tree and was trapped in his car for 40 minutes. The doctor I worked with was awesome and I had a blast as usual.

On Sunday, I got up early, exercised and then went to church. I got to go on a Dad/Daughter date out to lunch after church, where Dad and I just talked and caught up and enjoyed each other’s company. It was a great weekend and I’m very, very thankful for it. Even when life isn’t everything you want it to be, it’s still precious and should be lived to the fullest. May God’s blessings be upon all of you this week.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

In like a lion

The month of March is usually described as “in like a lion, out like a lamb” and that can definitely be said of how my month has begun.

Walking was going so well (with the walker of course) and then just like that…I started tripping and losing my balance again. I’m off kilter. Walking takes thinking about it again. But there is a season for everything and this too shall pass.

I was blessed beyond measure to spend the winter months walking just fine and that rarely ever happens. I’m a little confused as to why March has started out so rough, but I guess I’m due for some “bad” days. I put “bad” in quotes, because everything is relative :) My “bad” days are no where close to other's bad days. I’m not dealing with a terminal illness. I don’t want people to read this blog and think that I live in a bubble where I only see my difficulties and no one else’s. Although I do have a tendency to do this every once in awhile (I can't lie!), I do know other people struggle way worse than me. I know that I am blessed and I know that my “bad” days aren’t all that bad in the scheme of things.

Ironically, I’m now sporting huge bruises on my left leg, but NOT from falling. I used my legs as leverage to hold up/move a heavy tube TV and now I have evidence that I did it all by myself! I probably shouldn’t have done it by myself, but I’m kind of stubborn like that and the TV was broken anyway, so I knew I couldn’t damage it any worse. I didn't even know I had bruised myself until the next day when I wondered if I had fallen and just forgotten about it! Then I remembered moving the TV.

My brother Stanton and his wife Aubrey came in for a quick visit this past weekend. As Stanton (who’s about to start his 3rd year residency in emergency medicine) was helping me out to my car, he noted that I had been walking much better. I told him it was an illusion, because we had been at my parent’s house and (because of the carpet they have) I can walk without any assistance. As if to prove my point, (although I promise I didn’t do it on purpose!), I tripped right after he said this and he had to catch me.

I'm hoping that since March has come in like a lion, it’ll leave like a lamb and I’ll have balance and good walking again by Easter!