This past week has been wonderful. Walking was good. My confidence grew. I didn’t fall. A co-worker told me today that it makes her so happy to see me walking with just a cane and no walker. By no means is my walking perfect, but God gave me an encouraging nudge along the way this past week. I give Him all the glory for progress made and continue to knock down His door with prayers that I’ll soon be able to walk without a cane.
I have a funny example of how I’m NOT used to only using a cane and not having my walker with me. It happened on New Year’s Day at church. We had one combined service that day (instead of our regular three) and we had that service in the sanctuary (instead of the Family Life Center where I go to the contemporary service). Anyway, when I do go to services in the sanctuary it has been my routine to store my walker against the wall in the little alcove to the left of where I usually sit. To get my walker to this alcove, I usually walk down the center aisle and then in front of all the pews and circle back to it. So…New Year’s Day – without even thinking about it – I walked down the center aisle and in front of all the pews on my way to the wall in the alcove when, about halfway there, I realized what I was doing. I was actually kind of embarrassed, but I had to laugh at the same time. That incident was actually the second time I’ve done that. Today, when I got out of my car, I automatically unlocked all the doors. It’s been my habit for the past 5 years (since having this car) to do this, as I've always had to get the walker out of the backseat and my car doors automatically lock (just FYI…this is the one feature of the Honda Fit I can’t stand! There is a way to disable this function, I just haven’t done it yet.). Today, when I mindlessly unlocked everything, I laughed and reminded myself that I don’t have to do that anymore.
I’m happy to report that I only tripped once while taking down all the Christmas décor in my house. It took me 9 hours to get everything taken down and stored away. When I tripped, I was sure I was going to fall as it was one of those wobbly trips where I couldn’t quite get my balance. But then, all of the sudden, I found myself not wobbly anymore and I avoided a fall. Thank you, Jesus! After working all day in the house, I worked-out on my stationary bike. Admittedly, I thought I was kind of silly for doing so because I definitely got a work-out putting decorations away, but I did the work-out any way. It was my best work-out in a long time. The next day (Sunday), I was walking even better (save for an assist by someone at church helping me up on the sidewalk. That was partly due to the fact that I really needed a railing to hold on to and partly because I think I psyched myself out because there was snow all around and I was afraid of falling on ice.) than I had been walking. Come to think of it, I always feel much steadier on my feet after a work-out.
I do have what I call spurts of good walking. My walking is definitely NOT perfect, but I have a good and gracious God who allows me little glimpses of “perfect” (in my eyes!) walking and it gives me hope that someday soon, I’ll be able to ditch the cane like I ditched the walker.
On another note, it’s super nice to have a doctor in the family now!! I’m sure it’s not quite so nice for Stanton, but he humors the family and answers medical questions we ask him. I’ve asked him a few things. This past Sunday though, I told him that I had this callous on the bottom of my foot and it was really hurting. His response was that callouses don’t hurt. I’ve had this particular one for months now, if not even a year. I had told a co-worker about it and she said it might be a planter’s wart. I even think I’ve talked about this on the blog before. Anyway, all of the sudden this callous or wart or whatever it is has been hurting really bad. So much so, that it’s caused me to walk on my foot in a different way. So Sunday, I was telling my brother Stanton about it. He was adamant that it couldn’t be a callous because callouses don’t hurt. So my mom suggested he just look at it for me and he did. And guess what?! It IS a callous, but with a blood blister underneath it. ;) The blood blister is what’s causing the pain. Yay – Stanton saved me some money, I don’t have to make a special trip to the doctor about it and now I don’t have to worry about having anything that could spread. Thank you, Stanton! I also showed him a cut on my toe. It’s been there for a month or more now and will not heal. It won’t heal because it’s rubbing against my shoe. I’ve tried putting Band-Aides on it and they just fall off. I had some old “new skin” glue that I was going to use on it as well, but Stanton said that would come off too. He recommended that I get Moleskin bandages. I had never heard of them before and haven’t gotten them yet (because I haven’t been to a store that sells them), but I am definitely going to get them. He said it’s the best to use on stuff like this. Now, back to the part where I said the pain (from the blood blister) is causing me to walk on my foot differently - the callous is in the vicinity below my pinky toe on my left foot. I’ve been walking on the “outside” of my foot which is why it's calloused and now has a blood blister. But since it hurts to walk that way now, I’ve been walking more on the inside of my foot and what I’ve noticed is that when I do that my foot and toes lay perfectly flat on the floor. AMAZING!!! So maybe this callous/blood blister is a blessing in disguise. Maybe….
All of this to say, I didn’t turn the electricity in my deep brain stimulation device up today. I really, really wanted to, but something (or someone – as in God) told me not to today. I should wait. Wait patiently – which I don’t do well at all. Wait another week. Stay on the level I'm at (3.30 volts on Frequency C) at least one more week. Dr. Tolleson (at my last appointment) told me to wait up to 2 weeks to see any results and Dr. LeForce reinforced (haha- see what I did there?!) that fact – it could take up to 2 weeks (or more) to see certain results at certain levels. So, I’m waiting. Impatiently, I’m sure at times, but I am waiting and will continue to wait. After all – God’s Got This!!
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