What a whirlwind week this past week has been! I seriously can’t believe a week has already past. Where does the time go?
First and foremost, I hope everyone had a blessed Christmas. Our Savior’s birth is one of the most mysterious, magical, blessed and holy moments this earth has ever experienced. I hope you took time to reflect on the TRUE meaning of Christmas this year. A baby born in Bethlehem of an immaculate conception. He came to die and rise again to defeat sin, death and the devil. Without Christmas there would be no Easter.
Speaking of Christmas, I had a fantastic one. And no matter what anyone else says, I know I have the BEST family in the world. About 2 weeks ago, I was in the car with my mom, dad and grandmother on our way to see the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra Christmas concert when my brother, Steven called. Among other things we discussed Christmas Eve plans. My mom said that my brother Stanton and his family would go to the 4pm service since he had to work at 6pm in the ER. My brother Stuart would go to the 7pm service since his girlfriend wasn’t getting back in town until 4pm. Then she said about me, “Stephanie will go to all services (meaning the 4pm, the 7pm and the 11pm). Haha – my mom knows me so well. I DID go to all services. I joked that I went to the 4pm to see Baby Hope (her first Christmas!!), the 7pm to see Little G and the 11pm to really hear the message. :) I reality, I heard my dad’s sermon three times. I know what he changed in each message. ;) He remarked as we walked into the church together before the 11pm service that I was the only Elseroad that went to all three services (besides him, of course!). I really, truly got something out of each service and I am blessed to have been able to go to all three. On a lighter note, I also survived all three services without catching my hair on fire OR getting sick (both of which I have done in previous years…Christmas Eve and I don’t have the best of records in the getting sick or having accidents department!). So, score one for me!! (By the way…burnt hair smells like rotten eggs and if you have to throw up – even if you can’t walk correctly – you’ll never move faster to get to the bathroom!) Again, I thank the Lord that NOTHING BAD happened on Christmas Eve this year. In fact, something special between me and my 2 year old niece happened. We were at my parent’s house between services and Genevieve and I were playing in the room my parents created for her and Hope. All of the sudden, she wanted to twirl. So she started twirling and then she wanted me to twirl with her – so I did!! We twirled and twirled. It was a precious, miraculous (for me – that I didn’t fall!) moment that I will treasure close to my heart.
As glorious as Christmas Eve was, Christmas Day was just as glorious. Church at 10am was fabulous. The offer had been made (in all fun) for those of us that came to the 11pm service on Christmas Eve to just sleep at the church and come to the 10am service on Christmas – haha. I think we ALL made it home on Christmas Eve though and most of us made it back for Christmas Day services. Dad and I were the lone Elseroads who made it to all 4 services within a span of 18 hours. Everyone else had little ones at home or were working (whether in the ER like my brother Stanton, or at home like my Mom who made Christmas so special with all of her cooking and presents). After church, we all went to my parent’s house. It was a wonderful time. All of us in the family know that our parents love us. We also know that when it comes to Christmas presents: Dad works which provides the money, but Mom makes the magic happen with gifts. It’s one of her love languages. She told me it took her 3 days to wrap all the presents and looking at all of them, I could see why. After a brunch of Belgian waffles, turkey sausage links, and fruit, in which she slaved away at, we settled into an afternoon and evening of unwrapping gifts. Seeing the faces of my nieces was priceless. Seeing my mom’s face when we reacted to gifts she picked out for us was just as priceless. She and my dad are treasured blessings to me. I will never be able to thank the Lord enough for them or be able to show them how much I love them. For every seen or unseen thing they do, they deserve blessing after blessing from the Lord.
My treasured moment with Genevieve came on Christmas Eve, but my treasured moment with my 8 month old niece, Hope, came on Christmas Day. I was holding her and we were face to face and she started to wave at me. Her smile was from ear to ear and as bright as could be. She kept smiling and waving. A moment I will again treasure forever.
Christmas Eve and Christmas Day were beautiful. I thank the Lord for them. I thank the Lord for time with my family and treasured moments I’ll keep close to my heart, but there was also a part of me that wanted a Christmas miracle in the form of being able to walk without any assistance. In some ways I got it, in some, I didn’t. I got it in spurts, where I was able to do certain things without a walker or cane. But, overall, my walking was slightly worse than it has been recently. I truly believe that it was all the excitement. I had been told many years ago that any excitement – whether good or bad – could and probably would affect my walking. So, I wasn’t completely surprised, but I must admit, I was a little disappointed. Within the past week I went from 2.70 volts of electricity in my deep brain stimulation device on December 20, to 2.80 volts on Thursday, December 23, to 2.90 volts on Christmas Day to 3.00 volts today. I know that the Lord is doing something. I don’t know what, but His plan is always the best plan. I have to keep reminding myself of this though because I get very discouraged and sad when I don’t see results. I have to say that I’m glad though that I was distracted for the most part from walking difficulties because of Christmas. When you surround yourself with happy people, happiness has a way of sneaking and settling in. I am SO THANKFUL for my family. They bring me happiness. They also bring me joy and joy is so much sweeter than happiness. As my dad said in a sermon a few weeks ago: We can be unhappy and still be joyful. So, even when walking difficulties get me down, I am still joyful because I know the Lord works all things out for HIS glory.
Let me make it clear, even though walking was a little more difficult this past week, I didn’t fall. I didn’t trip. I didn’t slip. Compared to last year – I’m still rejoicing in the progress I have made. God is good all the time.
In my opinion, God reveals Himself in unique ways. I had Friday, December 23 off of work. I had just returned home from dropping something off at my parent’s house. As I pulled into my garage, I got the sudden urge to pick up all the branches in my yard that my trees had left behind from the rain. I don’t usually get urges like this, so I ran with it! As I was picking up branches in the yard, using neither a walker nor cane, it struck me – God was answering my prayers right then and there. I had prayed that morning that I would be able to walk without a cane or a walker that day and I was doing so. It also made me realize that I must be very, very specific with God. When I pray I should ask not just to be able to walk without a cane or a walker, but walk ALL DAY wherever I go without a cane or a walker. I had to laugh. I mean here I was picking up branches in my yard when God decides to give me a revelation that He IS listening to my prayers and He IS answering them. Not only did I pick up branches, I then got the urge to rake leaves and pull weeds out of my front flower bed. After about an hour or so of work, my lawn guy showed up and took over. I think that was God too. He knew I wouldn’t stop until the job was done, but He also knew that I would probably wear myself out, so he sent help in the form of my lawn guy. Andre relieved me of my duties outside, so I went inside and cleaned the entire house and wrapped all the remaining presents. What a fantastic, unexpected day. Thank you, Lord.
God just reminded me of the above day and I think it was on purpose. Today (before I started writing this post), I was feeling a little depressed, like “Whoa is me.” “This is as good as my walking will ever get.” “I’m never going to be able to walk without assistance.” And the phrases could go on and on. But God reminded me of Friday. Friday gave me hope. I CAN walk at times without assistance. This journey isn’t over with yet. God’s still teaching me and I’m still learning.
And now that I have written a mini book here, I’ll close this post. I hope some of my ramblings will be able to encourage others. I hope you can see that I’m trying to be as real as possible. I love the Lord. I know ALL things work for His good. I know He can and does heal. On the flip side, I also get sad, depressed, discouraged and impatient. But God’s Got This. Of this I am sure. So I wait on Him and sometimes in the waiting I find my greatest joys. I rejoice at and thank the Lord for the fun, the laughter, the love and the pure unbridled joy that Christmas Eve and Christmas Day brought me this year. My faith in the Lord, my family and my friends (of which you are!) bring me so much joy. I have much to be JOYFUL in – on this I will reflect. Again, I say GOD’s GOT THIS!!
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