Turn-It-Up Tuesday: May 24

It’s Turn-It-Up Tuesday again! I'll be honest, I’ve struggled writing this post tonight. There are only so many ways you can say, “I’m still waiting. No change yet.” ;) That’s the case this Tuesday and yet, tonight I’m feeling extremely blessed. I woke up this morning in a fantastic mood (two minutes before my alarm clock went off!) and have had an excellent day.

I turned the electricity up in my device today by .10 so I'm now at 3.80 volts.

So far, my walking hasn't gotten any better. It also hasn't gotten any worse, so that's something, right?! I'm grasping at straws here people. ;) I so, so, so want to post that I'm doing great and walking without assistance. To date that's NOT the case. But (surprisingly, to me!), I’m OK with that tonight.

God’s Got This. He’s got my heart. He’s got my soul. He’s got my mind. He’s got my body. He’s got ONLY the best in store for me (and for you too). So, tonight, I’m resting in that. Don’t get me wrong, I'm still battling frustration, impatience, and other things, but one thing remains the same: I KNOW God has big plans for me. I really, really hope I don't sound arrogant in saying that, because that's not my intent at all. I just know who holds my future and that He's doing great things in me. Even in this time of frustration and anticipation, worry and "what-ifs", I'm learning and growing. It gives me great comfort to know, ““Very truly I tell you,” Jesus answered, “before Abraham was born, I am!”” John 8:58 NIV

Although these posts can make it seem like I’m handling all of this with grace and a smile on my face, that couldn’t be further from the truth sometimes! I do thank each and every one of you who tells me that I’m handling it all so great. You inspire me. Really. I want to be what some of you think you see in me. But being honest, I’m grumpy, shallow, impatient, jealous, moody, cranky, self-absorbed, short-tempered and the list could go on and on and on. I’m constantly asking God and others for forgiveness. Just ask my family and closest friends. They’ll tell you! ;)

On a totally different note, I am dumbfounded by which of my blog posts get the most views and which ones don’t. I don’t know who reads this blog (unless you tell me!), but I can see how many views each post has and the ones I think will be read the most, aren’t and the ones that I’m the most anxious about or the ones I think won’t get read, get the most views. I know that’s God. It’s Him because He knows when I need encouragement and when I need a BIG piece of humble pie. ;)

And just when I thought I was going to close this post out, I read (on my phone, yes, I’m multitasking!): “Rocker has terminal brain cancer.” And God humbles me again. I don’t have brain cancer. Thank you, Jesus! I have a little difficulty walking. And it’s all brought into perspective again. It's humbling, so very, very humbling. Thank you, God for this humbling, because it's in this that I grow. (The rocker that has brain cancer is Gord Downie of The Tragically Hip. I don’t know who he is, but I ache for him.)

So, I’ll take my no new news this week. I’m more than thankful for it! God knows my heart. He knows I want to walk without any assistance. He knows I'm impatient. He knows I only want to do His will. He knows that I’m still waiting. And I know, God’s Got This.

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14 NIV