Tune-In-Tuesday: July 9, 2019

I’m not exactly sure what’s really been going on with me lately, but I’m struggling with what I look like when walking. Is that not the most laughable thing you’ve heard in a long time?! It’s true though. When I see myself in those reflective doors/windows that are in/on so many buildings, I struggle with accepting what I see. I want to be elegant and graceful, however, I’m everything but. My insecurities are so very, very small in comparison to what I know others of you are going through and yet they seem so big to me at times. I find it quite embarrassing to even write about this. It should completely be a “non-issue”. I’m letting my guard down a little bit to show my real self, the self that worries about what she looks like walking. Even writing these sentences, I’m laughing, because they are so ridiculous! I’m glad God’s allowing me to see the humor in it.

God also allowed me to see the humor in falling out of bed last night. 😊 OK, so I didn’t actually fall out of bed, but it was the closest thing to it. Sometimes I have to chalk things up to me just being innately clumsy. I had gotten in bed early as I was going to watch some TV. No sooner had I gotten in bed then I realized that the DVD I wanted to watch was not in the DVD player. I got up to change it and I tried to take a step and somehow ended up falling on my knees thereby getting rug burn. All I could do was laugh. No number of walkers or canes or any other assistive devices can cure me of just being plain clumsy. My first thought was that I couldn’t truthfully say in this blog that I’ve had no falls this past week, because I just fell out of bed. 😊

I struggle with self-image, with self-doubt, and with a whole host of other insecurities that would take me days to write down. However, I also know that I'm a child of God and He knows of all my struggles, all my sins, all my imperfections and He loves me in spite of them. And for that, I'm speechless. I know He has plans for me way out from what I could possibly even imagine. He always does. He charges me to press on and so I will.

When I focus on others, rather than myself, my worries, insecurities and fears become smaller. So, I’ll focus on others more than myself. I’ll focus on what God says about me more than the lies I tell myself about me because after all: God’s Got This!