I saw Dr. Gardner today and it was good news/OK news. Notice I didn't say good news/bad news! I wrestled with the idea of bringing my left shoe in with me again. My decision? I brought it in with me! Dr. Gardner first looked at the callous on the bottom of my foot. It has healed tremendously. There was only a little spec of it left and he got rid of that today! When I looked at it after he shaved it all off, I told him, "You're a miracle worker!" He said, "No, I'm just a carpenter." To which I said, "Like Jesus!" He then laughed and said, "NO!! I'm no Jesus." ;)
I got two X-Rays and he said that everything looked good and everything was healing nicely and like it should. Except that stubborn middle toe. So there was a decision to be made. Did I want him to do an in-office procedure where he would numb my toe and foot and then clip the tendon? Umm...YES. I didn't have to think twice about that. I knew two weeks ago that that was a possibility. In fact, I kind of had it in my mind that he would do it today. In fact, he even asked when I'd like it done and I said, "Today!" But, he wants me to wait at least another 2 weeks to allow the swelling to go down even more. Yes, my toes and foot are still swollen. It's gone down remarkably well, but it's not "normal" yet. No begging or pleading would get him to change his mind about doing it today. God's again teaching me (by forcing me!) how to be patient. I go back on June 27 to have that done. He said it won't take more than 15 minutes to do.
Dr. Gardner did say I could kick the boot to curb though!!! Surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly), I got scared. Would I injure myself without the boot? Would I be able to walk without it? So many thoughts running through my head. They manifested in my indecisiveness. Since I brought my shoe with me, I could have walked out in the shoe. But I couldn't make up my mind what I wanted to do. Finally, I just told Dr. Gardner, "You decide for me. Tell me what to do!" And so he did. He said to wear the boot for the rest of today. Tomorrow, I can wear the shoe. Whew...I'm glad he made the decision for me or I may have still been in his office at this hour trying to decide! I don't have to wear the ace bandage any more, but he does want me to continue to tape two of my toes. He said it'll continue to help the swelling go down.
I told him that my foot and toes continue to ache. Not all the time, but they do. He said that it'll just take more time for the incisions to heal and not be so tender. Patience, grasshopper! Patience!! I asked him if I still had to ice my foot and toes. He said, if I get home at the end of the day and I felt like it, I should. Just for 15 minutes or so. But it's not mandatory. I told him that I didn't get the compound topical cream that he wrote me a prescription for because my insurance wouldn't cover it. He said he could give me a prescription for another cream that's like an anti-inflammatory and that would help reduce the swelling. But, after much discussion, I'm getting the compound medication after all. Some of the deciding factors were that it actually also has a numbing agent in it which in my case would probably greatly help me. He also said that it's a big jar. It'll last 6-8 weeks and that's if I apply it three times a day. Once I start applying it, I don't have to ice my foot at all (that would have been the same with the other medication as well)!
I got to exercise today for the first time since April 17!!!!!!!!!! I am was SO HAPPY about that. I had asked Dr. Gardner if I could. He had me remind him again of what type of exercise. When I said stationary bike, he said that was fine. He said I shouldn't get on a treadmill, but a stationary bike was just fine. I asked him if he could see me on a treadmill? I told him I tried that once and couldn't do it. I was falling all over myself. He laughed. A few weeks ago I got a new work-out top that I've been dying to wear. I put it on tonight, put tennis shoes on BOTH of my feet and hit the bike.
I took it slow and steady. I wasn't even disappointed that I didn't go as fast as I normally do or didn't burn as many calories as I normally do. Tonight was all about just getting back in the swing of things. It was bliss. Yes, I said bliss. I think I need exercise as much for stress relief and endorphins then I do for keeping my weight in check. It was awesome.
Circling back to the beginning of this post - while I get to give my boot the boot for now, I will have to wear it again after I get the tendon clipped on June 27. Dr. Gardner wants me in it for 5 days after. He said it's more for protection and keeping the bandages in place then anything else. I call it dangling the carrot in front of my face. He's giving me two weeks without it and then I have to wear it again for 5 days? That's just cruel!! I'm only joking about that. But, part of my decision in making the appointment for the 27th was that I didn't want to get completely used to walking in a regular shoe only to have to go back to the boot. Also, Dr. Gardner is going to be out for the next 2 weeks so this was the first appointment I could get - so there's that! ;) I have to say that my foot is really tender where that callous used to be and I'm so glad that Dr. Gardner made the decision that I should wear the boot for the rest of the day today and start wearing a real shoe tomorrow because when I put on my tennis shoes tonight, I noticed my proprioception (My big word for the day that I learned from a physical therapist years ago. It means where you are in time and space) is WAY off. I thought the ground was closer then it was and it just felt really weird. Better to get that out of the way in the privacy of my own home then in front of co-workers - haha! Seriously though, I didn't fall.
My foot has been giving me some problems, dystonia related. I've got to get back to a setting (with my deep brain stimulation device) that works for me. I haven't found it yet and the frustrating part is with dystonia, you don't see results instantly, so I don't know if I'm on a good setting for me or not until a couple of weeks pass by. Oh well, this is teaching me patience!! Since I just "upped" it on Tuesday, I must wait. But it was giving me a time at Dr. Gardner's office. I told him that it knows it's being looked at so it wants to ball up. He said it knows it has an audience. Yes, indeed! So, I'm a little frustrated in that department. BUT - I have many, many things to look forward to and that makes me happy. I look forward to getting that middle toe fixed, I look forward to my birthday (and everyone else in my family's birthday - it's Elseroad Week June 11-June 16). I look forward to what God's doing in my life. A co-worker today reminded me that God didn't bring me this far to just forget me. He has a plan, a mighty, majestic wonderful plan. That's what I look forward to. I trust God knows what He is doing because always and forever, God's Got This!!
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